Mena Suvari talked about her teenage battle with drug addiction in her new memoir.
Extract from the book, Great World: Memories, appeared in Cosmopolitan today (July 27).
In an excerpt from Suvari, who starred in films including American beauty Another American Pie, describes a “double life” as she struggled with addictions while auditioning for roles and tried to continue her school work.
“Slowly but surely it became my life. And then it took over my life, ”says Suvari of an addiction that began in early adolescence.
Suvari continued, “The hours I spent at school were spent thinking about dropping out of school and writing a few lines. I did not go to bed until late at night, slept for a couple of hours, then repeated the day. Soon I was pulling out my little gold lacquered compact mirror with a butterfly embossing and sniffing the line in the school bathroom during recess. “
She writes of her experience with methamphetamine: “One part of methamphetamine made me hyperconscious, but there was another part that looked like the dark side of the road, and it led directly to paranoia. I spent most of the night waiting to hear if anyone was going to knock on my bedroom door. As long as I kept my marks, my health deteriorated. My whole back was covered with pimples. I’ve always had perfect skin. I knew it was methamphetamine.
In another passage published in Vanity FairSuvari went on to say that her drug addiction was caused by trauma from multiple sexual assaults during the same period.
“Between the ages of twelve and twenty, I was the victim of repeated sexual assault,” says Suvari, claiming she was raped by a friend when she was 12 years old.
Suvari detailed the alleged abuse in several relationships with older men.
“I still did whatever was asked of me. School work. Listening. Sex, ”she continued. “Only I needed to know how the fuck I am every day. I thought that I could and should suffer in silence. Obviously, this was my destiny. I prayed that someone would throw me a life preserver. I was ready to be saved every day. It never happened. “
Great World: Memories is now available through Hachette Books.